Quiet

We bought this house because it was in a small neighborhood and there were open fields on three sides. We bought this house because we could afford it. We bought this house because it was beautiful and open and filled with light. We bought this house because it was peaceful. We bought this house because it had a huge backyard and you could sit outside at night and look at the stars. You could sit outside in the early morning drinking coffee and reading a book and enjoy the quiet.

They are building a Wal-Mart in the field right next to our house. The bulldozers start every morning at around 6 am, and that's nothing compared to the noise and heat and congestion and lack of privacy that we'll endure once the damn thing is actually built. They built houses on the other two sides, nice neighborhoods full of people who wanted the same things we wanted, I assume. But right next door? Wal-Mart.

What we forgot is that we are not rich enough to have peace and quiet. We're just teachers, with teacher salaries, and we can't afford peace and quiet and space.

We can't afford to sell. Even if someone would buy. But even if we could, I don't know if I could let this house go. There are trees planted in the yard that both of our families gave to us. There's a deck that my dad and I built and a deck that my partner and I built. I still love the light inside, even though I rarely visit our backyard anymore. I don't know if I could give all of this up.

So we're waiting to see what it's like when Wal-Mart opens up. How bad it is. Whether it's bearable.

This is not an auspicious post to start a new blog with, but as I sit here in the semi-early morning writing I can hear the grinding and beeping of the machines next door, ripping up the field so they can lay down parking lots, and it's hard to think of anything else.

Maybe in the next post I'll talk about who I am.